our real estate is a great investment

[cross_and_bow]

"Welcome to Sunshine," says Juliet. "And to my front porch and whatever you do don't hit the light, it'll set Sherlock on fire."

Comments

[pythbox]

"...Er," says Giles. "In what sense?"

[cross_and_bow]

"You didn't hear about this? A couple years back the heir to Stark Industries produced a twin brother out of nowhere who called himself Sherlock Holmes. Then Tony died under mysterious circumstances and Sherlock's body was never found. For the obvious reason. He had to tell me to look him up too, I never really followed corporate celebrity types."

[pythbox]

"No," he says, "I must admit I missed that one."

[cross_and_bow]

"It's all on the internet if you want to check."

[pythbox]

"I'll take your word for it," he decides.

[cross_and_bow]

"Okay. So does the Watcher's Council actually fund Slayers, because I want to buy an abandoned building and it'll be less of a waste of squares to take their money than to have Shell Bell conjure a lot of jewelry and clear out the tills in all the pawn shops in town."

[pythbox]

"...We... usually don't fund Slayers directly," he says. "What do you need the abandoned building for?"

[cross_and_bow]

"To install an AI in. Also Sherlock will probably move there," says Juliet. "The AI was also killed, when Tony was, but we brought a copy home from another world for the local Sherlock."

[pythbox]

He takes off his glasses, makes no pretense of cleaning them, and rubs his face with his free hand.

"All right," he says, "I'll see what I can do." Pause. "...You're reasonably sure he's not eating people, I hope?"

[cross_and_bow]

"He stopped eating people when he encountered me on the grounds that it would probably otherwise be hard to get me to talk to him civilly instead of trying to shoot him, yeah. After his fridge broke he started storing jars of blood - labeled from a butcher shop - in mine. Pig and cow."

[pythbox]

"That's... civilized, for a vampire," he acknowledges.

[cross_and_bow]

"Yep." She decides this is not the time to mention or defend him killing Obadiah in that other universe. He didn't eat him, anyway.

[pythbox]

"Any more surprises?" he inquires.

[cross_and_bow]

"Apart from Sherlock and the building and all the interdimensional goings-on and me being the Slayer and having a do-not-enter sign up on my brain, nope, all's dull and boring." Pause. "I killed a demon last night? One of those unpronounceable things you have to twist to take apart? Would've taken me much longer to figure out if not for the stalling homework, so thanks."

[pythbox]

"That is, very literally, what I'm here for," he says. "And your stalling homework is now your official Slayer training."

Slight pause.

"So there," he adds, with dissonant stuffiness.

[cross_and_bow]

Juliet laughs. "Well, you won't have to come up with a combat training regimen that you can implement without me having to hit you, Sherlock's got that covered and he doesn't mind if I hit him. But I do still want to learn magic. I can't count on getting minted any time soon and a finite supply of Shell Bell's squares can only do so much."

[pythbox]

"I still intend to teach you magic," he says. "Eventually."

[cross_and_bow]

"I'll try to be conservative with my squares," says Juliet dryly.

[she_sells_seashells]

"Stella managed to force the door once," Shell Bell says encouragingly. "We don't know if it works consistently, but maybe someone will be able to come to you even if you never run into one of us at Milliways."

[cross_and_bow]

"Here's hoping," agrees Juliet.

[she_sells_seashells]

Shell Bell bends one of her fingers backwards again, mouth set.

[pythbox]

Giles frowns slightly.

[cross_and_bow]

"What?" Juliet asks.

[pythbox]

He continues frowning for a moment, then shakes his head.

[cross_and_bow]

"I bet you want to know why Shell Bell's doing that and you're concerned she'll answer you and this will offend your librarian sensibilities," says Juliet.